She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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