no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
