I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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