dude i'm inner monologue high
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
