i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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