Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
