he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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