So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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