I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
