So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I deserve this hangover.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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