Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Randomize
