Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Randomize
