he wants to bone in the snuggie
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize
