so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
