I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Randomize
