obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize