I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
