people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
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