I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
