I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
