No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
you had me at cake vodka
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
