What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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