Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
