I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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