He uses pillows to masturbate.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
My vagina is very pro this idea
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
