I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
