im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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