I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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