I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize