try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
