Soap is not a condiment
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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