Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
