now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
