I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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