Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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