Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
