Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
