It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Randomize
