Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Who died my cat blue again?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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