I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Randomize
