But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
