Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
