best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
