You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
