Small penises have feelings too.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
