Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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