if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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