But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
