Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
