i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize